Pathetic

Sometimes, I feel myself such a pathetic girl. I admit I am not pretty, not smart enough, but I just got low confidence without reasons. I thought I am the best during my high school, but after I entered the University, the deeper I dragged the worst out. I am not the smartest, not even in my language. I thought I can handle English very well, and now I realised I am not. I feel I am too overconfident last time, which built a bad foundation in my thinking. What a shallow thinking. Personally, I feel ashamed to myself either.

I am such a poker face. Inner of me actually so nervous, but outer of me shows me a calm face. What? The expression of me, inside and outside, such a big difference. Don't ask me why. This is me. Is it a potential talent? If it is a talent, I would like to accept, but the problem is, this talent doesn't really recognised by others. This is what my mind that made me to think that way. Pathetic. Really pathetic. I feel I got no talents at all, useless.