Extension of Semester - Pain

Be a third-year student, I should be proud of myself.
I shall, but I don't.
Because I have extended my semester,
and most probably I can't graduate on time with my fellow friends.
Feel kind of embarrassing as well as sad.
I couldn't stop thinking that my graduation, my friends' graduation.
It was just a needle pokes on me.
Feel so helpless, feel so stupid.
If I would follow my desire and persuade into IB earlier,
I wouldn't be in the shittest time.
Overestimate myself that I can study Finance.
Overestimate hits me hard.

I know, I shouldn't compare myself with my friends,
yet I scared to graduate myself.
It is much happier to graduate with your fellow friends than being alone.
The sharing happiness, the excitement.

Oh no! I can't really continue writing this...
Pls allow me to post this without a proper ending.
This writing is really painful.